Surviving Imposter Syndrome
Advice from your peers
👋 Hiya. Welcome to the final issue of the gazette for the year 2023 and it’s a bit of a cracker. Enjoy and if you find it useful, please share and let others know!
Surviving Imposter Syndrome
In the last issue of the Gazette, we published the results of the recent Imposter Syndrome survey. What we didn’t include though was all the beautiful, heartfelt suggestions of advice that were submitted as well.
The final question of the survey was “What advice would you want to give to someone struggling with imposter syndrome?” In today’s installment we are sharing all of the reponses received. These might not work for, or be applicable to, everyone, but if you’re ever suffering from imposter syndrome then hopefully this will prove a powerful resource of guidance and positivity to draw from…
Talk to peers to help understand it is common. Don't suffer alone.
Talk about it with your peers. It changes so much to know you're not the only one. Learn to recognise it if you can and tell yourself, out loud and often, that it's not real.
If you trust/respect someones opinion on the subject - believe their opinion that you can do this.
Communication is key to helping improve it, talk about something you’re unsure of and openly welcome questions from others. Be open to change and be open to saying “I’m not sure, let me go find out for you what the best way to do this would be”.
Look at your track record and/or keep a brag book for when you need reminding what you are capable of.
Dive into getting feedback and share your feelings with a safe partner who can broaden your perspective. The more you share the more you feel like you belong and the more you belong the more you will feel like you are safe to be wrong, and that stops you worrying about whether you are right, and allows you to step forward more confidently
It’s a good sign and should not overwhelm you.
As long as you get pay, keep on hustling.
Use your old powers in new ways. Find people to learn from who are credible and respect wherever you are in you journey. Stay curious and take risks instead of criticizing yourself. Coach yourself with compassion.
Everyone feels it, some of us deal with it better than others. "feel the feel and do it anyway".
Most of us have it too.
Be sure to act within your area of expertise frequently, while not limiting yourself to your comfort zone.
Just take a minute to gather your thoughts about what you will do, take things slowly.
Set it down, it's like guilt, you don't have to carry it.
Find opportunities to speak about your area of expertise in conversation with novices and experts. This will help you find the gaps in your knowledge and develop plans to grow your expertise.
Try to reframe it as something you aren't comfortable with, yet.
Use it, honestly nothing drives you to better yourself that fighting against it and building your skills. Use it instead of letting it prevent you from moving forward.
Take a step back and look at what you’ve achieved. Remember to give yourself praise for a job well done, and write down your wins so that when you have feelings of imposter syndrome you can look back at what you’ve done and remind yourself you’re doing ok.
You are not your thoughts.
The fact that you're even thinking you're not good enough probably shows you are - it's usually an indicator of someone who is humble and eager to learn, but maybe needs a confidence boost.
You will worry more about whether you are "enough" for a position more than anyone else. We are always the harshest on ourselves. Seek treatment for imposter syndrome or you might miss out on some great opportunities.
Somebody else perfected the role you're trying to play. Find your true self and let it shine.
Everyone’s just figuring it out as they go.
It's okay to not know everything, it's an opportunity to learn. I've always been told 'fake it until you make it' even by senior professionals, and I think I'm starting to realise that sometimes you just have to put yourself in uncomfortable situations to grow.
Speak to your line manager about how you are feeling. Chances are your thoughts aren't how you are perceived.
Work on your self worth and confidence.
It affects everyone, so if everyone is an imposter, then no one is.
Take breaks from work, take a breath and look at all the small positive changes you are making and make sure they are celebrated.
You have experience, and your experience is valid, therefore any ideas or thoughts they have are coming from a strong place.
Be kind, but be brave. You've come this far, why not try and go just a little further?
I heard a writer saying that he asked Neil Gaiman if he gets imposter syndrome. His reply was something like, "Don't wish for your imposter syndrome to go away. It gets replaced by something much worse. The feeling that your new work just isn't as good as your old work."
Take a moment to breathe, stand back, and look at the situation from a kind, external perspective.
Talk about it, it is very likely your peers will be surprised and have many examples of why you deserve the role you hold.
Imposter syndrome is a good sign that you are learning and growing. Fear and excitement are the exact same set of sensations framed in two different ways. Can you reframe your fear that you don't know enough or don't have enough skills into excitement to learn those things and gain those skills? The sensations are anticipation can you listen to them? What could go wrong in the work you are doing? Considering the risks and researching how to mitigate them could mean you deliver something even better.
Just ask - be honest - if you feel like you need developing in some area then that's not intrinsically bad, it's part of career growth so own it.
Find work in a safe psychosocial environment, built on trust and where respect for each individuals history and competence is taken to account. This is not standard and is crucial when choosing workplace. Mistrust and disrespect among peers in a work enviroment calls on demons that will inflict imposer syndrome on peers.
Give good feedback/results the same weight as bad.
No one is right all the time.
Look to yourself and how you’ve improved not to those around you, you never know how someone else is struggling or what path they have taken or how they feel. Expecting to be as good as more experienced people from day 1 discredits their journey. Focus on you, your values, your growth and how you want to feel and what you want to achieve.
Tell your peers, they're the most able to contradict your assumptions.
If you do get constructive feedback try not to take is personally, instead view it objectively and use it to grow in skill and confidence.
Someone once said to me "Feelings are not facts" and that's really resonated with me. Just because I feel someone is disappointed in me or I haven't lived up to expectations, without them saying explicitly so, it is not a fact, just a feeling. Talk to those around you about what you're experiencing and ask for constructive feedback often. This helped me gain insight quicker which in turn kept the imposter syndrome at bay.
I would emphasise what I have learnt over time: that no one knows it all. Also I would suggest reversing the situation and to view the situation from the point of view of the other person: ie that it looks good if someone is showing an interest, and is keen to learn.
It's not just you, a lot of people experience this.
I always ask the question “Have you stopped to think about what this thought is making you do and feel, and are you happy with its purpose?”
Talking about it is a relief. Our company was amazed at how many others felt similarly.
Take a break, ask for help.
Recognise that it's normal, it's natural, and it's a sign that you recognise you need to learn more. Don't panic, just get busy learning.
We look at our flaws rather than our strengths. What you say in to yourself is so important. Remind yourself why you deserve to be there and even if uncomfortable use positive affirmations to ensure what you are telling yourself is positive.
Keeping an achievement journal can help you look back and see how far you've come and how qualified you actually are. Also if you're this good at being an imposter, then you're pretty good!
You aren't alone in feeling that way, from the bottom all the way to the top.
It can be a good thing, if you let it drive you to continuously better yourself.
Reach out to other people in your field and ask to talk to them. Be honest about how you feel and it's very likely someone else who you might feel is more capable or distinguished than you feels the same way, and that will help to put it into context.
I don't think it's something that has a solution, I think we all suffer from it from time-to-time and it's more about managing the effects rather than trying to ""fix"" it.
I believe fear is at the root of imposter syndrome but believe in yourself and avoid worrying about others thoughts.
Don't stress, we're all winging it!
Use facts to build your confidence, while everyone hates writing a CV, looking at your own experience is a good way to remind yourself you are qualified.
Look behind to see where you come from, look forward where you want to be.
You are not alone. Your colleagues are likely at a similar level in terms of experience and proficiency.
Think about the value YOU bring and focus on that. If there are areas you are not comfortable with accept that is OK but find people who can plug those gaps for you. The business doesn't expect you to do everything, but it helps if you can show how to fill those gaps, even if you can't plug them yourself.
Speak to a therapist - your impostor syndrome might be a systemic issue with unstable self worth.
Trust those who chose you to put you in that position. Also never be afraid to say "I don't know that right now but I'll come back to you", problem ownership does not mean you need to know every answer immediately.
Stop seeing it as a negative but look at the positives on why you may be experiencing it - strengthening yourself, learning new skills etc
Most people who achieve anything have it. Try to be objective and see yourself genuinely as others do.
Everybody feels out of their depth and is winding certain aspects.
Talk to your Imposter and don't take everything it tells you at a face value. Insert a question mark at the end of every sentence it tells you.
You're not alone.
Bonus bits
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